The voices in my head

The most beautiful thing about life is that we get to coexist with everyone and everything regardless of their age,size or beliefs

Don’t you think it’s amazing that strangers might meet in the bar and still start a conversation,a photographer and a sniper who just bumped into each other in a bar might enjoy their shots of tequila debating about taking a perfect shot .

I don’t know how You might feel about this,but I actually think it’s wonderful how we try to share hearty laughs and put smiles on peoples faces despite being on our low days.

It’s beautiful that we get to tap our emotions from staring at a color,it was just the other week that I actually learnt that bright colors might trigger hunger,hence explaining why most fast food joints are painted Orange ,yellow am not sure if green is also bright but it was on the list.

I actually think it’s amazing how we can actually travel the world on a low budget just by maybe reading about that city,culture or even country you’ve always wanted to visit some choose to travel the world through food and I think it really is beautiful.

Don’t you think it’s actually wonderful that everyone is born having a soulmate?the problem only comes when you have to find them,here I am proudly thinking that anyone passing by humming my favorite song must be my soulmate.

You only have to treat life as a canvas and paint your own reality to achieve euphoric emotions

Have been holding on with palms bleeding from unhealed scars.but my hands are sore now ,my vision blurred by the tears in my eyes. With only traces of what I believe was love,I reluctantly walk away .

Have dreamt of ‘us’ once

Laid out priorities but still wild and preposterous

You being a blessing and not a curse

Lost in our own universe

Being each other’s muse

Secret rendezvous without a care

Wrapped in my arms as I untangled your hair

Being all yours and still giving all reasons to stare

With nothing but Love to share

Nothing but bliss to bear

But We exist in the real world and such dreams don’t work out here

I strongly believe that Everyone has a part of their life that is filled with uncertainty, We all have self doubts , built up anger,we may be filled with fear,groundlessness,frustrations and it probably shouldn’t be a problem.

We are free to engage with our inner-selves and respond to the uncertainty of the universe and I really don’t see why people jump onto the word ‘insecure’ to brand a person for being self conscious.

I’m expected to smile and laugh all the time, and I feel like I’m mostly thinking. In reality, I know I’m probably not coming across as ugly or emotionally and mentally disturbed as I feel I am,but my experience is very much real to me.

Growing up receiving a lot of negative energy from friends,teachers and sometimes family might have taken a toll on me. There are days I wake up tired and wish life could come with an on and off button so I can have the privilege to turn mine off.

I don’t know if am living life in the right way,but on days I don’t wish death upon my life I only have enough enthusiasm for living through that day.

I spend large chunks of my time trying to picture how amazing life would be if I wasn’t me,how easier my life would be if I wasn’t the same height as the boys in my class,if my shoulders were less broad, I sometimes feel people would treat me better if only I had a perfect set of eyes that don’t need glasses to see,maybe people would finally think I was amazing if my teeth were smaller or maybe if I got better brains I would probably know what to do when things are tough.

I can’t even tell who I am anymore.I am always racing with the demons in my head. I get lost in my own thoughts,I keep comparing myself to people I look up to and all I’ll be is dissatisfied with my life.if only I could live life differently.

I sometimes hate that am too nice to people that don’t deserve my attention,I hate myself for being kind and giving my love to people who only gift me a broken heart in return.

I’m usually quick when it comes to tearing myself down ,assigning myself the title ugly or dumb or incompetent, and it’s interrupting my ability to live my life, interact with people, go to school,I need to believe more in myself and my strengths, but I don’t know how to get there.

Two faced or true faced?! I don’t know what’s right anymore,should we be afraid of being judged for who are and what we believe is in or we rather sink ourselves in the societal norms of what’s right and what’s not.?

Isn’t it amazing how you are attracted by the way a person talks ,walks,smiles and generally their existence.

We paint this beautiful and perfect scenarios in our heads every time we think of them,we want them to be perfect.

We don’t allow our perfect imagination to get glitches and crashes.we want to fix every single mistake,we want to make sure things are exactly as they were in dream land .

Are we really,attracted to the person if you can’t allow them to be flawed and not the perfect character you imagined,I believe every one has a vice or two and may be not be very proud or at all proud of it.

Does it mean your Prince Charming turns into a frog the moment he can’t afford the Brazilian wig ,our friend ,suzzana got from her boyfriend ?

The funny girl you met last month is now less of a rib cracker cause you learnt she likes pineapples on pizza and prefers something stronger than tea to start her day?

I don’t know but,Should our flaws give us new names? Does it mean we get less attractive for being flawed ? I wonder why they chose to walk away, the moment they get to know you ,for who you really are and not the person they assumed you were!?

The last time he left,she cried more than the words I love you were said to her,

Everyday was grey,he dimmed her light and black became her happy color,

Scrolling through her gallery,Determined to clear any trace of what she believed belonged to her,

Reminiscing on what was, every happy memory turned into a nightmare,

She blamed herself for beings gullible,if only the red flags were brighter,

Wounded and heart broken she gave up on her fairy tale dreams and firmly believed no man deserved her!

Dear boyfriend. I’m not sure if you’re out there or you’re just one of those wild dreams that never come true…but if at all you exist,have we met ?probably not,Incase we have I’m sorry it took me a while for me to realise how much of a great pair we would soon be,if not soon I won’t mind meeting you later cause you would probably be worth the wait.

I sometimes sit and imagine how we shall meet,would it be as magical as the ones I envied the last time I watched those romantic movies?I can’t help but to wonder if I’ll have to knock down your books for us to meet,maybe I’ll meet you at your regular coffee shop trying to compose a poem.I would probably like,or maybe you would be reading one of your favorite books,would I maybe get to meet you through a mutual friend? whichever the case I’ll just be glad to have met you

Sitting here I can’t stop but to wonder what are some of your favorite things to do?do you enjoy sunsets as much as I do,is coffee your cup of tea?would you be a better dancer or we’ll both have to be ashamed whenever we have to dance in public,would you rather stay in and enjoy a good book,tv show or maybe you would prefer going out with the boys and catch up over a beer or two,I wonder what happens when something upsets you,there’s so much I would love to find out but that shouldn’t be a problem for I’m sure I wouldn’t get bored with you talking about yourself.

You would probably be the first boy I would get to know,I want to know your favorite color but I’m mostly interested in your thoughts about life and I obviously won’t mind finding out how much the dark freaks you out,I want to hear your life story ,the first time you fell in love, the crush you knew was never going to work out, the first time your heart broke. All of it. I would love to listen to them all. I would share every bit of my story with you as well. That will be quite amazing. Interesting, isn’t it?

Incase you are hoping for a girl that’s as perfect as the girls I see on Instagram,well, I’m sorry to disappoint.I at times resemble a sack of potatoes.. I cry more than once in a day, I laugh a lot too,but my laugh can get very loud and annoying,I at times get as blind as a bat of course with out my glasses am automatically blind,I sometimes make the best dishes but at times we’ll have to eat out .speaking of food, I sometimes spill food on my shirts as I eat,still not disappointed? l’m glad you are not.

Despite being all flawed, I just want to let you know, one thing that can’t go wrong with me is my love for you,I am going to love and cherish you everyday and every moment we get to share.

Just hang in there honey, I will find,love you and promise never to let you go.

With lots of love and hope, Your girlfriend.

Ps.ill be the luckiest girl if you insanity matches mine,Nothing can come between two people who are crazy and In love I believe ❤️

Despite the unpopular belief,we are allowed to experience mixed reactions in various situations.we can be happy yet slightly bothered or bothered yet completely content.some times the rain falls while the sun is out ,but hey,does it stop you from enjoying the colors of the rainbow?

Burdened with a problem not knowing who to turn to? She cries herself to sleep every night,she doesn’t want to be there anymore,she’s part of a land that is full of hurt,frustrations and troubled minds.

There’s an alien glued to her back and chewing through her heart,dreams and bank account..she knows what to do but afraid all it might bring her is more pain, it kills her not physically but emotionally.she tries to reach out but her hands are full,full of fear,full of shame and suicidal thoughts.

It chokes her that she has no choice but to reach out,the situation is beyond her capability.

instead of living in frustration wondering what could possibly go wrong,she prays for courage,of course we all need the support we can get,she is ready to tackle whatever is thrown her way and she’s open to the possibilities that exist.

“Sometimes things might not work out as we anticipated but allowing yourself to find meaning and joy out of these situations does”she is reminded by the bundle of joy she has just received

WHICH OF THIS EPITAPHS WOULD YOU PREFER : “Hurried,Worried,and Buried” or “Loved,Laughed,and Left a Legacy”

Life is a sum of what brightens your mood,what makes your heart skip a bit or two,what makes your eyes pop out and brighten up,Its a sum of the things that bring you disappointment and chaos, it’s simply a mixture of joy and grief.

Just like an artist decides what brush is best for a specific painting,what paint goes well with a specific piece of art,and what two colors might look great together,that’s how much control we have over our own lives.

To some life is about the type of car you possses,the latest trends on the internet,what is considered cool by society.Some of us would even go out of our ways to secure some of this designer belts and shoes and all that,just to be accepted and not be called ancestral but the thing is,is that what life is all about? Are you really happy with yourself?Are you really living?

Get busy living or get busy dying ~Stephen king~

You might want to live a life where you choose to spread love and laughter with the people around ,a life where you are true to yourself and the people around you,You might not be aware,but, genuiness is the ultimate personal power.

If at all you choose to live a rushed life,where you worry about what they think and not what you believe in,then,Are you even alive?For you to be alive you have to live for you and not them.

Honestly speaking, who would want to be pronounced dead from a life you hadn’t even lived!?

FROM THE OUTSIDE LOOKING IN, ITS HARD TO UNDERSTAND .FROM THE INSIDE LOOKING OUT ITS HARD TO EXPLAIN .

I found a friend in a ‘stranger’,I know we all have,but mine is sent from heaven , “it’s okay not to be okay” he says to me every time I vent to him.He made it easier to talk about my emotions and boldly share my insecurities with,and without adding filters I would openly share about my past,fears,strengths and what life felt like ,He felt perfect,but as for human nature everyone has their demons to battle with I can’t be the only one,and I thank God for him. Finally opening up to someone who didn’t seem bored by the fact I am flawed and not perfect.I have learned to trust him and confined in him ,he might be the only person that I wholly trust in the world. I would ,I have and I will continue to bare myself truly naked in soul and in mind to,I just pray he doesn’t get the vibe I’m the girl to cry wolf.